So maybe tomorrow, I'll find my way home.

I've travelled a fair bit this year, and as of this entry, I've just came back from Thailand and Cambodia.

…But was it for business? or pleasure?

I can't answer that.

However, I did meet my sister for the first time ever in my life, a question I've had for 20 years long, now answered.

We actually planned a surprise birthday for our dad and the funny thing was, at that point, we haven’t even met each other yet.

I guess it’s fair to say that blood is definitely thicker, and that we’re cut from the same cloth of spontaneity. 

Anyways, before I continue to write any more, I’d like to say sorry. 

I've been on an emotional roller coaster as of late and one of my specialities at the moment is to not finish my sentences, let alone anything, really. 

My words are broken, my sentences aren't connecting, I like to drift away from context and I'm just not writing well right now.

But I do promise that I’ll be better, as I owe a few long awaited entries to this blog of mine.

I’ve been blessed to rediscover myself and my past through traveling, as you know from my previous blog entries about my time the US, then recently to Bangkok, which has been a hell of a ride.

I haven’t really processed anything yet, nor do I know if I have to process anything at all. However, meeting my stepmother for the first time, and my sister, and those that I’ve lost for almost 20 years is supposed to be a huge thing, right?

But, we simply just met up for lunch/dinner and acted as if we'd never lost each other. 

To me, that was probably a bit casual… maybe even not ceremonial enough - but I didn't want it to be, really.

In hindsight maybe that’s a good thing because we might not necessary want to speak about what has happened in the past.
...I just don't know.

I recently stumbled upon a buddhist saying; Don’t let your past judge your present, or set your future. So I guess this is where we start fresh again as a family?
…I hope so. 

All I know is that we are here, together as one and we're moving forward in the right direction.

Talking about family though,

I still continue to miss everyone in the US daily - I miss them so much. 

But, is it that I miss them? or do I miss myself and who I was in the US? 

...I honestly can’t answer that.
On second thoughts, I do miss them - so much. 

On top of that, do I even know who I am anymore?

There's so many versions of me out there;
From Sydney to Chicago to Bangkok. From Banker to Restauranteur to Realtor.

Is it me or my mindset that's different? 

Does it really matter? I guess not.

However,
I really need to find where home is - where my heart and soul belong;
Where my happiness belongs.
It doesn't even have to be a place, it just has to be within -

It has to start with me.

... I continue to stare at my compass symbolically.